It can seem easy for men to be overlooked during their partner’s unexpected pregnancy. After all, the pregnancy decision isn’t technically theirs to make. If you’re experiencing this situation, where does your role lie in all this?
First of all, know that your voice matters. Your feelings are valid. But the tricky part can be voicing your concerns while respecting your partner’s opinions. This is often difficult to navigate, so we’ve compiled some helpful advice for you to consider:
1. take a Deep Breath and Consider How You’re Feeling
You likely feel various emotions from the pregnancy news, including shock, fear, and even anger. How did this happen? What are you and your partner going to do?
Consider that your partner is likely feeling similar emotions, in addition to any pressure from family or friends. She may worry about feeling judged or ostracized from her loved ones. And you might have the same concerns. Give yourself the space to consider your emotions thoughtfully before approaching your partner with a level head.
2. Reassure Your Partner that You’re There for Her
Your partner may struggle with the fear of abandonment, especially if you both don’t see eye to eye or she’s had complex relationships in the past. Reassure her that you will step up and stand by her side throughout an unexpected pregnancy and beyond. Together, you represent a united front.
Offer to attend ultrasound and options information appointments with her. Be that person standing in her corner. It is easy to feel alone during this time. Your support demonstrates courage and responsibility, two admirable character traits.
3. Seek Support for your physical and Emotional well-being
Make no mistake: your partner is the one who is pregnant. However, experiencing anxiety and stress can cause frustrating physical problems. Be sure to get plenty of sleep and take care of yourself.
Improving emotional health is essential for both men and women. Speak with a trusted friend or family if you need someone to talk to. And if you’re experiencing mental health issues like anxiety and depression, seeking professional counseling is beneficial. You can’t support your partner if you don’t care for yourself.
4. Make an honest effort to review her options
Your partner may be open to you making the pregnancy decision together. Regardless, ensure you’re voicing your opinions in a measured, calm way. Raising your voice or pressuring her is an immature way to handle this situation. Give her the time to process her pregnancy news before sharing your concerns.
Research your pregnancy options and understand the pros and cons of abortion, adoption, and parenting.
Is there Support for Men at our center?
Pregnancy Options Center of Warren County provides you with the services you need during all stages of an unexpected pregnancy:
- Pregnancy options information
- “Earn While You Learn” program to support you with parenting classes and material support
- Our Baby Shop, where you can “purchase” items earned from classes
- Men’s mentoring services (you’ll be partnered with male coaches)
- Post-abortion coaching (we understand that men can suffer from the pain of abortion and wish to support you)
- Community referrals for housing, food, material assistance, Medicaid, etc.
Contact us today to learn more about how we can help you. You matter to us.